69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
There's even glitter on my cock...
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