just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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