If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
