Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
