One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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