So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
