It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
