I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
