who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I have post one night stand depression
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