thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
