Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
