oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
