i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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