how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
The air taste purple.
Randomize
