i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
