its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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