I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
