I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
