im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
