My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
