Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Randomize
