I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
