Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
