break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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