I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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