My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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