you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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