Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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