I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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