it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
i've created a new STD.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
