Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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