He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
