Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I am one with the molecules
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
