I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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