you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
We have so much sex to catch up on
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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