Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
