I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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