you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
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