At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
