That's intense
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
