So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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