Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
