STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
