Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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