So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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