tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
