that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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