yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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