So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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