I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
