id be glad to
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
